


Just Cold

by MusicalFrost



Category: rise of the guardians
Genre: Angst, Depression, Family, Friendship, Gen, Healing, Hope, Hurt/Comfort, NOT a JackRabbit, Scars, Self Harm, has a happy ending
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-26
Updated: 2017-09-08
Packaged: 2018-12-06 00:39:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,350
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11589459
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MusicalFrost/pseuds/MusicalFrost
Summary: Why does Jack, a winter spirit, wear a hoodie anyway? One year after the movie.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> WARNING: This story may be triggering. The first chapters are a little more serious, and then it gets better. Let me know if I misspelled anything please.

E. Aster Bunnymund sat quietly in his warren, painstakingly, almost reverently, painting eggs for next Easter. It had only been two months sinse last Easter, but Bunny was already excited for the next one. This was his holiday! This was the holiday that symbolized hope and that gave hope to children around the world. He, the guardian of hope and new beginnings, was not going to do things by halves. Bunny was going to get everything done, and done right, if it was the last thing he did. So that is what he spent doing, hour after hour, week after week. Except for sleep and food, he wasn't going to stop until he had enough eggs and baskets for the children of the world. 

He finished painting the last detail of the beautiful blue, orange and yellow egg and set it on the floor. It wobbled for a second on it's tiny legs before dashing toward the basket of the other completed eggs. It jumped in, settled beside it's brothers and sisters, and Bunny chose another plain egg to start painting. He shifted on the green grass, desiding that this one was going to be pink, green and purple. He had just dipped his paint brush in the first color, when he heard a sudden crackling sound behind him. Startled and thinking one of his precious eggs had cracked, he whipped around. When he saw what was behind him however, he narrowed his eyes and folded his ears back.

" Noooo!" He groaned. " Jack, don't you have something else to do besides bother me?" As always, his Australian accent made Jack smile.

" Not really," Jack said, shrugging. " I got bored, so I thought, why not go tease the Easter Kangaroo?" He grinned and twirled his staff, which made the ground crackle with frost again. Bunny glared at him.

" Jack, I don't have time for this! I have to finish painting all the eggs for next Easter, and I cant have you screwing everything up. Not like last time." With that last comment, Bunny knew he had gone too far. He saw a flash of hurt in the winter spirit's eyes, and sighed. " Sorry, Frostbite. I just want to get this done quickly so I'm prepared for Easter." To his surprise, Jack nodded.

" No, I get it. You have a job to do." His smile faded a bit, and he tugged on the sleeve of his hoodie. " I actually wanted to...I wanted to ask...Can I help you? You know, paint eggs?"

Bunny stared at Jack. Was he actually asking to  _help_ with Easter? He studied the guardian of fun, realizing he did look kind of worn out: he had purple bags under his eyes, and despite his blinding smile, the conflict in his eyes suggested he hadn't had such a great time lately. 

" Are you alright, Mate?" Bunny asked. Jack nodded, but Bunny could tell it wasn't true. He studied Jack a bit longer before giving in. " Fine, you can help." Jack started walking toward the paint, but Bunny placed a paw on his shoulder. " But DONT freeze anything, dont break anything..." He left the threat sink in. He didn't need to go on. Jack chuckled and patted the Pooka's paw.

" I get it. I won't hurt or freeze anything, I promise." Bunny let him go, and he sat down on the grass, laying his staff beside him. He grabbed a paintbrush and looked around for an egg to paint. Grunting, Bunny sat down next to the winter spirit and handed him a plain egg. 

" Remember, Easter colors. Nothing too crazy, though, it will take too long." Jack nodded and cupped the egg in his palm like it was made of glass. He dipped the brush in the orange paint and began to decorate.

Both guardians painted in silence for a while. After a few minuts, Bunny looked over at Jacks egg, fully expecting it to be covered in blue snowflakes, but it actually looked pretty good. It was orange with purple tips and a bright green mustache dominated the middle. Bunny snorted with laughter. A mustache for Easter, huh? He immediately wiped the smile off his face when Jack looked at him. Too late. Jack saw the smile.

" You like it, huh?" Jack said teasingly. Bunny grunted, and turned back to his own egg.

" I guess it'll do." He said. They continued painting eggs. Bunny was a bit faster then Jack, with all the practice he'd had over the years, but Jack was still pretty quick. The pooka was quietly impressed at how good Jack really was at painting. Who knew this knucklehead could sit down long enough to do anything like that? Suddenly, Jack piped up.

" You know, I've never really celebrated Easter before. It looks really fun, though. It's fun watching the kids find all the eggs." Bunny nearly dropped his brush.

" You haven't... You've never celebrated Easter? Mate, it's... that's...Why?" He stared at Jack. The teenager shrugged. 

" It's not like I had any eggs to find. I'm not blaming you." he said quickly, shooting a glance at the pooka. "Besides, Easter's for all the kids, right? They deserve it." Bunny gaped at him.

" But Jack...if anyone deserves anything, it's you. You helped defeat Pitch Black." He coudln't believe Jack never celebrated Easter. That he'd never celebrated the holiday of hope. Jack shrugged again, but didn't respond. He obviously didn't want to talk about it, so Bunny let the topic go, but he would be revisiting the subject later, definitely. A few awkward moments passed, forcing him to change the conversation.

" So, Jack, can I ask you something?" 

" Hmm?" Jack replied distractedly. He was trying to paint a football on a new egg.

" Why do you wear a... what do you call it? A hoodie? I thought winter spirits didn't need them." 

For a moment, Jack froze. Bunny thought he saw a flash of panic in his eyes, but it disappeared quickly, and he dismissed it as a mistake while painting the football.

" I'm just cold." Again, Bunny almost dropped his brush. He looked at Jack with wide eyes.

"What do you mean, you're cold? You're a winter spirit. You can't get cold." Speaking of cold, Bunny felt the air drop a few degrees.

" Y-yes we can." Jack said defensively, and some snowflakes popped into existance above his head. " Just because we control snow and ice doesn't mean we dont get cold." He shifted on the grass, and Bunny noticed how he pulled his sleeves down more. Jack set the egg down on the ground where it joined it's siblings and stood, grabbing his staff. " Thanks a lot for letting me paint the eggs, Bunny. But I think I should go." Bunny peered curiously at him.

" Are you sure you're all right, Mate? You dont look so good." Indeed, Jack had turned paler, if that was possible, and his hands had started shaking. Even so, Jack grinned at the Easter Bunny as if nothing were wrong.

" Of course I'm ok! I just have something I need to do." He started walking toward the exit tunnel. " See ya later, Kangaroo!" he called, and with a final wave of his hand, he disappeared. 

" I'm not a kangaroo!" Bunny shouted after him. He stared at the tunnel for a moment and then returned to his work. What had that been about? It seemed like Jack was embarrassed about his hoodie. Or he was telling the truth, that winter spirits do feel the cold. Whatever it was, something was wrong. He sighed and set down the egg and paint brush. Something was definitely bothering Jack Frost. First, he came to Bunny asking to help with Easter, which was really out of the norm for the usually mischievious showpony. Then, he gets upset over a little thing like a hoodie? Bunny might not be besties with the guardian of fun, and he might even seem to dislike him sometimes, but he did care about him. Plus, he was a guardian now, which meant he was family. If something was bothering Jack, he was going to find out what.

Bunny heaved himself to his feet and thumped his foot twice one the ground. Instantly, a tunnel appeared, and the pooka scampered through it. When the tunnel closed, a beautiful pink flower stood proudly in it's place.

***********************

 Jack sat with his back against a tree, his arms wrapped around his knees. He was shaking like a leaf, his haunted eyes staring at nothing.

" That was too close," he said. If anybody had been listening, they might've thought he was close to tears. " I cant let anyone find out I cut." Sniffling, he let go of his knees and rolled up his right sleeve. He stared at all the scars covering his pale arm, old and new. The darker strips of skin stood out against his normal, snow white complexion. He looked at the fresh, still blissfully stinging cuts on the inside of his wrist. No, he couldn't let anyone find out. They wouldn't understand. They wouldn't understand that he deserved this. He rolled his sleeve back up and tipped his head back against the tree.

Why did Bunny have to pry about the one thing that made him seem like a normal person? His hoodie covered his scars, protected others from seeing what he'd done to himself. It kept his secret safe. Jack felt guilty for lying to Bunny, but he had to, to keep him from finding out.

Suddenly, Jack heard a wild chuckling, and it took a moment to realize he was the one producing it. The laughter grew till it shook his whole body, and even to him it sounded borderline insane. Who was he? He was the guardian of fun, sworn to protect children. He was Jack Frost, the giddy, trouble making, happy prankster. And yet here he was, showing his true colors when no one was around. Why did he bother with anything? Why did he even try to be a guardian? His smile faded. Because protecting children and helping them have fun was the only way he could help anyone. His winter powers hurt people, and he couldn't stop hurting them even if he tried. Every year, he'd hear reports of all the people who'd been killed by his blizzards, or people who'd fallen through icy lakes because he didn't make the ice thick enough. The least he could do was make these children happy and protect them, at least for a little while. Simply put, to not be a guardian was a mistake, and he'd made enough mistakes already.

Speaking of mistakes, he'd just made one. He'd lied to Bunny. Bunny hadn't been the nicest spirit to Jack before he was a guardian, but he was family now. In Jack's mind, lying to family was absolutely not ok, even though he did it all the time. Plus, he'd annoyed Bunny by visiting him in the first place. He knew Bunny didn't like him dropping by unannounced, and yet he'd done it anyway. He was lucky Bunny had let him paint eggs in the first place. Jack guessed that he'd probably painted over them again after he left, thinking they were awful. Why was everything he did wrong? Finally, the dam burst, and Jack yanked up his right sleeve again. He then conjured a sharp, glittering shard of ice as wide as his hand, which reflected the sunlight. It was summer now, so he'd have to hurry before the blade melted.

He gripped the blade, brought it to his arm, pressed down and yanked it across. A thin line of red appeared, slowly getting bigger until the beads of blood dripped down his wrist. He slashed at his wrist again, relishing the pain that unexplainably quieted the horrible voices and insecurities in his head and allowed him to think. He studied the two cuts. To him, after so long of doing it, they were...calming, somehow. He would never be able to explain why, but they were. He raised the shard to his wrist again, only this time he placed the tip under the last cut. He pressed down, the tip digging into his flesh, and dragged it across, tearing, making a deeper, more painful gash. After the cut was made, he tossed the now dripping red shard of ice away, leaving it to melt, and sat back against the tree again; he couldn't remember leaning forward. Then he just sat there and stared at the new cuts and the blood flowing down his arm in tiny rivers. They burned and stung, but Jack ignored the pain. Now, he'd punished himself for lying to and annoying Bunny, and at the same time he'd cleared his head.

If cutting was supposed to punish him for his mistakes, why did it help him think better? Why did it set him free?

Finally, Jack waved his other hand above his arm and froze over the three cuts, hissing slightly as he made a sort of bracelet made of ice. It would stop the bleeding and keep his hoodie from being ruined. He then wiped the remaining blood off on the ground and pulled down his sleeve, feeling a great deal better, for how sick it was. 

It was time to go home.

He gripped his staff in his left hand, using it to haul himself up, and commanded the wind to take him back to his lake.

********************************

 Bunny popped out of the ground, landing on a thick, chrunchy blanket of snow and ice. The magic tunnel closed behind him, leaving a small, yellow flower that drooped sadly in the cold. The pooka looked around, his keen eyes searching the barren landscape of Antartica. As he searched, he shivered and wrapped his arms around himself. Why was it so  _cold_ here? It seeped through his fur, into his bones and made him want to turn right around and go back to his warren. But he couldn't. Not yet. He had a job to do.

Bunny heard a faint shift in the wind, and the snow crackled behind him. He whipped around, his hand on his boomerang, ready to defend himself. When he saw what was behind him though, he relaxed, letting go of his weapon. 

" You winter spirits have a nasty habit of sneaking up on people." He said. The pale man smiled, his sea blue eyes sparkling. 

" Hello, Bunnymund." the man said. His voice was unexpectedly deep. He dipped his head in greeting, his short, white hair blowing in the wind. He wore nothing but a pair of leather pants and a pair of sturdy boots. His muscled torso was bare, exposed to the cold, sending a shock though Bunny. Had Jack been lying?

" Hello, Blizzard." by now, Bunny's teeth had started chattering, making it difficult to talk. Blizzard seemed to sense this.

" What brings you to Antartica, of all places? I'd have thought you liked warmer climates." 

" I c-came here looking for y-you. I wanted t-to ask you something." Intrigued, Blizzard leaned forward slightly.

" And what might that be?" 

" Can winter s-spirits like you feel the c-cold?" Bunny stamped his feet to get the blood flowing and rubbed his paws together. Oh, how he hated the cold. Suddenly, Blizzard started laughing. His voice echoed across the landscape, and he leaned forward, holding his middle.

" You came all this way to ask me if I get cold?" Bunny scowled impatiently, though the feeling in his face had all but disappeared. 

" Aye, Mate, but I have a g-good reason for it. Just answere the b-bloody question." Blizzard, still chuckling, gazed at Bunny with a delighted look in his eyes. 

" Very well. If it's that important to you, I will answer. No, we do not feel cold, as you can obviously see." He gestured to his bare chest. " We cannot feel the cold, for it would prevent us from doing our duty: spreading snow and winter when and where it is needed." Then he stared at the freezing guardian with an odd expression. " If I may, why do you want to know such a thing?"

Bunny barely heard the question. His grass green eyes were wide and his thoughts were racing. Jack  _had_ lied. But why? If something was bothering the boy, why didn't he just tell him? Why was he so uncomfortable around the topic of his hoodie? His attention returned to the man in front of him when the question was repeated.

" Just looking after a friend, Mate. Jack F-frost." Blizzards eyes widened, and his smile grew as wide as the sky.

" The prankster Frost, huh? How is the child doing? I havn't seen him in a while." Bunny's ears snapped up.

" You know him?"

" Ha! Do I know him? I was the first spirit he met after becoming one himself! I helped him learn to control his powers." The spirit got a far away look on his face. " That was fun. I'd never seen talent like his before, though he didn't see it himself." He looked at Bunny. " You didn't answer my question. How is he?"

" You know, I'm trying to figure that out myself. Something's bothering him, and I don't know what. It's got something to do with that hoodie of his, though." Bunny started hopping up and down, trying desperatly to warm himself up. Suddenly, a thought occured to him.

" Hey, do you know where he got it? Like, did someone special give it to him?" That would explain why he was so possessive of it. In that case, Bunny had nothing to worry about. But his hopes were dashed when Blizzard responded.

" Does he still have that old jacket? The blue one? Ha! In answer to you're question, I do know where he got it. I gave it to him." Bunny narrowed his eyes at him, making the patterns on his head shift slightly. Blizzard, noticing this, giggled. " I would not say I was special to him, however. I helped him learn to control his powers, and I only gave him the hoodie because he seemed embarrased that his current shirt couldn't quite cover him completely; it had been torn to shreds, but by what I do not know. Other than that, we have not interacted with each other, so I would not consider us friends. No, if he still has that jacket, it would not be because I gave it to him."

Bunny's mind reeled. Why? Winter spirits don't get cold, and he didn't keep the hoodie because it was special to him. So why on earth did Jack-

Suddenly, it clicked.

Oh. 

_Oh._

Oh, no.

Bunny stopped hopping and froze with the sudden realization. His breath hitched and his eyes grew wide. How could he have been such a fool? How did he not see it sooner? It all came rushing back, the way Jack fiddled with the sleeves of his hoodie, the way his hands had started shaking when it was mentioned. The way he left in a hurry, when Bunny came too close to revealing his secret.

" Thank you, Blizzard, for answering my questions." he said quickly. " I have to go now." Then, ignoring the other spirit's confused calls, he thumped his foot on the ground, and sprinted down the tunnel. His heart pounded with this new revelation. He had to find Jack, and fast.

Jack was a cutter.

 

 

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long wait everyone.

Jack finally arrived at Burgess Lake. He touched down on the dirt, stumbling slightly as he slipped from the winds grasp. Panting, he leaned on his staff, trying to catch his breath. Flying always left him breathless afterward, whether from how fun it was or because the air was thinner the higher you go, he couldn't tell. Maybe both. When he had calmed down, he turned to his lake, taking a moment to soak in it's beauty. 

Clear water lapped at the shore, sounding like gentle whispers. The grass all around him was a vibrant green which nearly gave him a headache if he stared at it for too long, and the other plants and flowers were just as colorful. The trees surrounding the lake of Burgess were in full bloom as well, the green leaves and branches swaying in the same breeze that had brought him here. Summer was leaving it's mark on the world.

Of course, in Jack's opinion, Burgess and it's lake looked just as beautiful in winter. To him, nothing could substitute the sparkling icicles hanging from the trees, and the way they would fill with rainbows if the sun hit them just right. His most favorite thing however, was the thick white ice of the lake when he'd frozen it over. The stillness of it, the integrity, tethered his heart to it in such a way that his loyalty to his home could never be broken. While he skated over the ice, he had to trust it, and the stable, sure ice had never broken or cracked, had never failed to do it's job. It had never failed him when he'd trusted it, so he'd return the favor. He'd protect his home no matter what, from anything. Nothing would ever hurt this beautiful place.

Normally, during winter and sometimes in fall, he'd sleep on his beloved frozen lake. In fact, that was another thing that he loved: Feeling the soothing cold beneath him, even getting rained on. He loved it when it rained while he was on the lake, it was fun trying to freeze all the rain drops before they hit the ground. He didn't mind the awful weather while he was trying to sleep. The ice and the tree branches above were the equivalent of a warm bed and a roof to him. But where did he sleep during the summer and spring? 

Jack walked over to a tall, skinny oak tree about twenty feet away from the lake. He looked up at it for a second, studying the brown trunk, before pressing a small knot embedded in the bark. He couldn't feel it, being a winter spirit, but he knew that this particular tree would be cold to the touch, even though it was summer. It was imbued with his magic after all. As soon as his pale fingers touched the knot, a loud sucking sound filled the air, caused by a round hole suddenly appearing at the foot of the tree. Jack gripped his staff tightly and lowered himself into the hole, his bare feet finding the icy ladder almost immediately. As he climbed down the ladder, deeper into the hole, the ground seemed to seep back together above his head, closing up the entrance like it had never been there at all. 

When he reached the bottom of the ladder, he turned to face the short tunnel ahead. Blue ice crystals started glowing in the walls and floor, brought to life by a tap of Jack's staff on the ground. The sudden light illuminated the tunnel and a small cave at the end of it, and Jack made his way towards it, absently tapping his staff on the walls.

The cave was not very big by any means, just a place to sleep in, really. Starting at the end of the tunnel, the floor was made entirely of ice. The same blue crystals shined under the ice, turquoise lighting up the cave like bio-luminescent jellyfish might light up the dark ocean. It was here that Jack would sleep during the warmer months. The ice down here never melted, offering him a nice, cold place to go where he could still protect his lake. 

This underground cave was no substitute for his lake, but Jack was still proud of it. It took a fairly large amount of his magic and energy to make the ice so it never melted, and the same amount, if not more, to make ice glow. The whole thing was worth his exhaustion, though. Glowing, forever frozen ice was pretty cool. Another thing he was proud of was the collection of small, intricate ice sculptures in the back of the cave, sitting on a shelf. There was a variety of shapes, from animals to trees, all made of the same never melting ice. Everice, he liked to call it.

Jack propped his staff against the wall and shuffled over to the sculptures, picking one up. It was a tiny likeness of Jamie, Jack's first believer. Jamie had his winter outfit on, complete with his favorite winter hat and a face-splitting grin. He had ice skates on as well, and was posed to look like he was ice skating. Jack set Jamie's statue down and picked up another one. This time, the clear silhouette was Bunny, standing with his arms crossed in that proud pose he so often struck. Jacks heart tightened as he looked at the Pooka, regret rolling off him in waves. His arm twinged painfully under his sleeve, reminding him of how much he'd annoyed Bunny with this last visit.

He never should have gone to the warren. He'd just caused pain for Bunny. His eyes burned as he thought back to when he'd decided to go. He'd been on the verge of cutting, and he'd had this weird thought that spending time with his family would help. And it did, for a while. Painting eggs had been fun, at first. But then he'd nearly had a panic attack when Bunny had mentioned his hoodie. Why was he so weak? Why couldn't he hide his emotions better, and just slog through it? Then he'd left, surely hurting Bunny's feelings in the process.  

" Why is everything I do...wrong?" Jack muttered to himself, his voice shaking. He reverently set the Bunny statue down and looked toward the last thing that was in the room. Just underneath the shelf was a huge book, also made of everice. Jack didn't have to read it to know what was in it. He'd carved thousands, if not millions, of tiny names in it. Every name, that he knew of, that had died in one of his storms. The names of everyone he'd hurt with his magic. Because his presence was a curse to human kind.

Jack's arm twinged again, and he pulled up his sleeve. His bracelet, which was not made of everice, had almost melted completely on the way back home. The fresh, deep cuts that he'd done less than an hour ago were now visible, but at least they'd stopped bleeding. The first two cuts were pretty deep, but the third one was especialy grisly. Now that Jack was looking at it more closely, he could see this one was going to take a long time to heal. Good. More punishment for him.

He wondered what the scar would look like. 

Jack rolled down his sleeve and glanced one more time at all the clear figurines on the shelf. Then he simply laid down on his icy floor next to his staff, put his hands behind his head and closed his eyes. He focused on the cold floating up from the ice, seeping through his hoodie. Oh, it felt good, especially in this hot weather. For a moment, the thought of being comfortable confused him. If he was supposed to be punishing himself, why was he indulging his need for cold? Jack relaxed however, when he found the answer. Because cold helped him sleep, and when he was asleep, he couldn't hurt anyone. 

So that was what he did. He fell asleep to give the world a break.

******************************************************

Bunny popped up from the ground near the lake, startling a mother duck and her babies. His feet thumped to the ground and he started booking it, sprinting around the lake and the area beyond.

" JACK!" He screamed. His voice carried over the water and reverberated off trees. " FROSTBITE! ARE YOU HERE?!" His call went unanswered, and as Bunny finally took the time to look around, he realized that besides the common ducks, squirrels and other rodents, the area was empty. Bunny's green eyes were wide and he gasped for breath, his head craning in all directions while he searched for the winter spirit. Jack had to be around here somewhere. This was his home, wasn't it? He dashed along the beach, keen eyes penetrating the forest. Where was he?

Bunny's chest ached, and his heart fluttered in panic. How could this happen? Why did he not see it sooner? Bunny, in all his years, centuries in fact, had seen dozens of children who had self harmed. If you knew how to look, they all showed the same signs, just like Jack had. Fiddling with sleeves, rubbing their cuts, burns etc, getting extremely agitated when someone mentioned a clue to their secret. It boggled his mind as to why such amazing, caring, perfect people felt the need to hurt themselves. And they were perfect, they were. They always cared about other people, they always strived to do their best, it seemed. Of course, he understood some of what made people cut: they felt helpless, depressed, like they make too many mistakes. 

But why did he care so much about self harmers? How did Bunny know the signs so well? He'd often try to seek them out, so after a while he'd memorized the signs. But why? The answer was simple: because he had failed them. These amazing children were sad, depressed, anxious, angry, and devoid of-

Hope.

They didn't believe there was hope for them. As Guardian of the children's hope, Bunny had failed. And now he'd failed Jack Frost, perhaps a very long time ago. The thought filled him with anger. Not at the children, but at himself. It also filled him with determination. Determination to do his job well, to prevent failure, and determination to help these people have hope again. He would help these people get better, if it was the last thing he did. 

Bunny slowed to a stand still, breathing hard. It was obvious Jack wasn't at the lake right now, so where else could he be? Bunny needed to think. Where would Jack go? He liked cold places, so could he be at one of the poles? Maybe. He was also best friends with Jamie and his friends, seeing as they were his first believers, so he might be at Burgess. As he racked his mind for any other places the guardian of fun could be, Bunny rubbed his arms, shivering. Jack would want to be alone for a while, right, so the logical place to go was Antarctica-

Wait, shivering? Why was it cold in the middle of Summer? Electricity shot through his limbs as he whipped his head around. There was only one person who would make it cold at Burgess Lake, so he could be here after all.

" Jack!" Bunny called. " Where are you? I just want to talk." He moved cautiously around, looking for the source of the drop in temperature. For a brief moment, Bunny snorted, reflecting on his current action. For once in his life, he was actually  _looking_ for cold.

He searched everywhere in the cold spot, knowing that the colder it got, the closer he was to his friend. He'd just finished searching the ground when he realized that Jack often hid and slept in the trees. He cursed and looked up, scouring all the tree branches in every tree in the cold spot. Eventually, he stopped and sighed.

" _He's not here,"_ he thought despairingly. "  _The cold must me a remnant of his magic."_ The pooka pinched the bridge of his nose and began to pace. He needed to find Jack quickly, and again, the logical place he would be was Antarctica. Then another thought made him freeze. He'd been so focused on finding Jack that he didn't stop to think what he would do when he did find him.  What would he say, what _could_ he say? Nothing he did would make Jack's feelings go away overnight. Perhaps Bunny had been too hasty in his pursuit of the winter spirit. Maybe, he needed to wait. He needed to get his thoughts in order, a plan to help his friend, and then he could talk to him. But what if something happened to Jack before then? Bunny pinched the bridge of his nose. What was he going to do? His head spun with a million thoughts, concerns and possibilities, and he put a hand against a tree to steady himself.

" YAAOOOWW!" Bunny snatched his hand back, swearing, hopping around and shaking it to get the feeling back into it. What the heck just happened? The tree did something to him! At first, the pooka thought it was some type of bug that bit him, and he glared at the tree, but as the feeling returned he realized it wasn't a bug. It was, in fact, the freezing cold. The very cold he had been looking for. The pain in his hand now forgotten, Bunny looked at the tree with new interest. That temperature was too intense to be a mere remnant of Jack's magic. In order to stay that cold, even in the summer, it had to be combined with it, which meant that this tree meant something to Jack. No spirit would ever imbue their magic into something without a great deal of thought, lest it be destroyed, hurting that spirit in the process. But why was this tree, out of the thousands in the forrest, special to Jack? Why was it so important? 

Bunny circled the tree, inspecting it. What did Jack do to the tree? Now that he knew it was special to him, he had to figure out what for. Jack's magic was combined with the tree now, which meant it had to have some kind of magic ability. Bunny continued to study the tree, growing more and more frustrated. As far as he could tell, it looked completely normal. He shivered again as he circled it, and he realized that it was colder on one spot on the trunk than anywhere else. He leaned his face forward, cringing as he let his sensitive whiskers pinpoint the coldest area on the trunk. Again, he yelped and leaped away as his whiskers brushed over a dark knot, tiny icicles crusted to his nose.

"  _I am never doing that again,"_ he vowed.

After a moment of warming his face back up, he scrutinized the knot. This had to be it, the place where Jack put his magic. He grimaced as he realized what he had to do next. He quickly snatched up some leaves from the closest non magic tree and wrapped them around his hands, which sounded muffled when he clapped them together. There. Now he had some protection from the cold. Bunny, not delaying the action any longer, pressed the knot, and waited.

At first, nothing happened. Bunny glanced around nervously, preparing do defend himself if that was needed, but after a second, he wondered if anything was going to happen at all. He was just about to push the knot again, when the loud sucking sound filled the air, nearly startling him out of his fur. Then, suddenly he was falling.

Buny's stomach caught in his throat as he disappeared below the surface of the earth. He yelped, as one can't help but do when supposedly falling to their death, and flailed around, searching desperately for something to break his descent. His hand smacked painfully onto a bar of some sort and he gripped it with all his strength, crying out when his shoulder was nearly yanked out of it's socket. A loud clang sounded when Bunny's boomerangs and back crashed into more bars, and he immediately twisted around to hug the bars with all four appendages. 

" What the HELL?!" he shouted, breathing heavily and shaking like a leaf.  _This_ is what Jack made with his magic? A bottomless pit. What was he thinking? He made an effort to calm his breathing when another sucking sound appeared, and his gaze snapped up. Bunny watched helplessly as the ground re-sealed above his head, blocking out the sun.

Bunny stayed that way, clinging to the ladder, for several moments. He screwed his eyes shut and forced himself to take deep breaths until he'd calmed down enough to continue. He used his left back foot to feel around for the next rung, and went on his way. 

As he climbed, the adrenaline from falling wore off, and he finally felt how cold the ladder was. Of course, it would only make sense if it was made of ice as well. He wondered how it didn't melt with the considerable heat on the surface. Speaking of heat, it was quickly disappearing the deeper he went, making his teeth start chattering. The ladder hurt his feet, as they weren't padded like his hands were, so he quickened his pace, wondering how deep he would have to go. 

Finally, Bunny reached the bottom, and he stepped away from the freezing ladder, greatful that the ground was dirt instead of ice. He stared uselessly into the darkness, trying to see what was ahead, and took a few steps forward. Heart fluttering as he found the tunnel, he took another step forward, and light suddenly exploded into existance, temporarily blinding him. He rubbed his eyes and looked around. His breath hitched.

This tunnel alone was perhaps one of the most beautiful places Bunny had ever seen, and that was saying something, considering how much he disliked ice and snow. Hundreds of tiny, glowing ice chunks were embedded in the walls and floor, bathing the pooka in a cozy, if not warm, blue light. On closer inspection, he noticed that every single light had little designs and frost patterns on them, making each of them individual works of art. How long had it taken Jack to make all of these? Bunny grinned as he imagined the showpony sitting cross legged on the ground, painstakingly creating those designs with his tongue sticking out. They reminded him of his Easter eggs back in the warren, and he wondered if this was the place the winter spirit learned to paint. Then the guardian of hope frowned. It took the pooka all year to paint all those eggs, and here were several years worth of glowing ice rocks, which looked like they took the same mount of time to make. Again, Bunny wondered how long it took his friend to make all of these. Jack must've been so lonely. He felt a pang of sadness in his chest at the prospect, and he forced himself to walk on.

The tunnel wasn't as long as he thought it would be, and Bunny soon reached the cave. The tunnel was beautiful, but the cave took his breath away. Starting at the cave entrance, the floor was made entirely of thick, sturdy ice, and the darkness was pushed away by more ice crystals. The light that these crystals gave off was oddly comforting, like a night light in a dark room. On the far wall, the light glinted off tiny ice sculptures on a shelf, which were only about three inches tall. Below that, a peculiar, seemingly random block of ice sat heavily. While the rest of the cave was breathtaking and beautiful, this block seemed darker in color with jagged patterns on it that practically shoved the feelings 'angry, sad and conflicted' into Bunny's heart. It gave him an uneasy feeling.

Finally, off to his right, something else was there, so still it almost escaped his attention. He turned to look at it...and his heart stopped.

There was Jack Frost, lying on the ground.

And he wasn't moving.

 

 

                                               

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I didn't do a very good job with Bunny's point of view, so let me know how I can make it better.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, please Review, tell me how I can make this better. Also, send me requests! Give me prompts to write about: One Piece, Rise of the Guardians, Guardians of the Galaxy, Star Trek, Fairy Tail, Blue Exorcist, Sherlock Holmes or How to Train Your Dragon.

Bunny's POV

" JACK!" Bunny shouted, shooting forward in an instant to be by the winter spirit. He gripped his shoulders, shaking the boy, yelling unintelligibly as he tried to wake him up. This couldn't happen! This was not supposed to be happening! Why hadn't he helped Jack sooner? No no no no nononono _nonoonono_ NONO  _NO_! All common sense was murdered by panic. He could still be alive right? There was something Bunny was supposed to do, but he couldn't remember what. Something about a pulse? Making his heart beat again? CPR! That's right!

The pooka placed two fingers on Jack's neck, desperately hoping to feel a pulse. A few gut wrenching moments passed and Bunny felt nothing. " NO!" he screamed. He refused to give up on his friend. He interlocked his fingers and placed his hands on the teen's chest, pounding rhythmically with all his might with the hope of restarting his heart. 

***********

Jack's POV

Jack was by no means a light sleeper. When he was really out of it, no amount of loud sounds could make him even remotely conscious. A group of people with chainsaws, bagpipes and war drums marching past him couldn't wake him up, so it would make sense that Bunny couldn't either with all his screaming. What could wake him up however, was touch. If something touched him, that feeling would penetrate his mind and wake him almost instantly. So, even if Bunny's yelling didn't work, his performing CPR did. 

Jack floated back into himself the moment he felt a blinding pain in his chest. A hard, persistent hammer made a valiant effort to become part of his skin, driving invisible nails into his ribs. His eyes snapped open and he cried out, slapping the (furry?) hands away from him. He shot to his feet, kicking his staff into his hands, and whipped around, his staff pointing at the culprit. When he saw who it was, his eyes widened.

" Bunny?! What are you doing?!" Indeed, the gray pooka knelt there on the ice, his hands shaking, his face a mess of emotions. What was he doing here? Why had he been pounding on his chest? Jack's anger evaporated however when he saw the rabbit's eyes. Several emotions swirled around in those green depths, clearly visible. There was sadness, despair and hope all at the same time. Confusion, concern. Most of all there was relief. Prominent and unbridled relief. Jack lowered his staff to the ground, rubbing his sore chest as he squinted at his friend. 

" Jack..." Bunny started. His voice cracked with emotion and he had to start again. " Jack, you're ok." He stood up, trembling, staring at Jack like he could disappear at any moment. The teen stared at him.

" What do you mean? Of course I'm-" he cut off, suddenly horrified. Oh. So that's why he was here. That's what he was doing, he was performing CPR.

He'd thought Jack had killed himself.

He looked at his bare feet. " You know, don't you?" He whispered. Bunny's reflection on the ice nodded grimly, and he knew there was no going back. There was no getting out of this conversation. He cleared his throat. " Yeah, I'm fine. I just fell asleep." 

" No." Bunny said sharply, " You're not ok. And that's why i'm here, to help you be." He took a step forward, pausing, obviously struggling to find the right words to say. Meanwhile, Jack fixated on a glowing piece of everice in the floor. His heart pounded, his arm pulsing painfully with every beat, and he suddenly felt light headed. This was bad. This was very, very bad. How had Bunny figured it out? What did he think about it? He felt his face heat up with shame. 

" Do you hate me now?" he blurted. He looked desperately at the Guardian of Hope, feeling so...ugly. So dirty. And now that the pooka _knew,_ he was positive he had no more friends. Who could love someone who cut themselves? Bunny probably hated him now, and he would tell the other guardians and they would hate him too. Bunny looked shocked by the outburst, and opened his mouth to say something, but Jack cut him off. " Look, Bunny, I know this is bad, and sick, and twisted, and evil. But I cant stop! I deserve it! I have done so many awful things, and no one else is here to punish me, so I punish myself." Jack hadn't realized he was backing up till he felt his back press into the wall behind him. " Cutting helps punish me, but it also makes me feel better. I know that doesn't make any sense to any one else, cause my mind is so messed up, but it slows everything down. It helps me think. I cant explain why it helps, but it does." 

Jack felt like he was going to explode, with all the feelings assaulting his heart. It was unbearable. He was so ashamed, and sad, and angry at himself. It coiled up in a prickly, sharp knot and sat heavily on his chest, and he knew that it would never go away, it would Never. Get. Better. There was no hope. And now Bunny, and soon the other guardians, his only family, knew what a screw up he was. Jack shut his eyes, feeling hot tears trailing down his face, and pushed into the wall, as if he could disappear through it and make the pain go away. He took a deep breath.

" I don't blame you if you hate me. That's ok. I hate me too."

He fully expected Bunny to start yelling at him like he always did when he was annoyed, but the words never came. He didn't say what a disappointment Jack was, or that he was a failure. He didn't say he was too whiny or dramatic. Instead, the teen felt a pair of furry hands grip his shoulders softly, and he looked up through his tears to see the pooka's sad eyes.

" Jack," he growled, his voice thick, " don't you dare." The winter spirit's eyes widened with surprise. Bunny kept going. " I know what you're going through, mate. I've seen teenagers all over the world start self harming because of these feelings. They feel helpless, unwanted, hopeless." He paused on that last one, looking at the floor, and then continued. " Some of them feel like everything is their fault. But Jack, it's not. Everything is not your fault." He squeezed Jack's shoulders, forcing him to look him in the eyes. " You are not unwanted. You are not helpless. There. Is. Hope."

Jack struggled to breathe. Every sentence Bunny uttered felt like a punch in the gut. Oh, how he wanted those things to be true. He wanted to be loved. He wanted to make a difference, and he wished more than anything there was hope for him. But none of those things could be true, could they? Even if some of those things were true, it didn't erase the fact that he hurt people. His magic killed people. His chest constricted at the thought, and he felt like he was suffocating.

" Bunny, I hurt people. I kill people. I'm a monster-"

" No." Bunny interrupted, shaking the teen slightly to emphasize his point. " You're not as bad as you think you are, I swear to you. And I'm not done yet." He took another deep breath. " I'm not saying this to guilt you, alright? Everyone has their perfectly reasonable reasons, that make sense to them, for feeling this way, and you do too. They just need a little help seeing that they still have hope, that the world hasn't fallen off the edge yet. Jack, you can still get better." That one sentence was the last straw on the camel's back. All the confused, coiled up emotions in Jack's chest exploded, and he pushed Bunny away.

" NO!" he shouted, tears still falling down his face. The pooka stumbled back, panic igniting in his eyes once more. " I might be able to get better Bunny, but I don't deserve to!" Jack began pacing back and forth on the ice, and the air temperature dropped dramatically, making the ends of Bunny's fur turn into mini icicles. 

" I know, you guys are my friends right now. But even so, that doesn't change the fact that I kill people! It's my job to spread winter across the world, and to make ice and snow and cold, but people die because of it. But I cant stop spreading winter, can I? If winter suddenly disappears, the whole world will suffer even more. So I have to keep killing people. But I don't want to!" He stopped pacing and turned to Bunny, his face desperate and pleading, angry and sad all at the same time. " I can't stop cutting. It's my punishment, the very least I can do for those poor people." He gestured to his everice book. The movement was not lost on Bunny, although he didn't know what the book meant to Jack. " My victims," he spat. " And cutting is nothing compared to what they've had to go through." He stopped, finally out of breath. Throughout his ranting, Bunny's face had grown more and more shocked and concerned. When Jack saw this, his eyes grew wide. He exhaled sharply.

" Bunny, I'm so sorry. I started yelling at you and-" Bunny flicked his ears.

" Mate, what on earth do you have to be sorry about? Everyone has to vent sometime, and you weren't offending me at all." Jack looked at him incredulously, as if there was no way it wasn't offensive. He started panicking when Bunny turned around and walked into the dirt tunnel, thinking he was leaving, but the pooka just sat down, looking slightly more comfortable now that he was off the ice. Following his lead, Jack sat down, but still on the opposite side of the cave. They sat for a while, the tension so strong you could almost see it, before Bunny spoke again, his voice gentle. 

" Jackie, it makes me so...sad...to hear that you feel like this." He met the spirit's eyes. "I'm scared for you. And I want you to know that you are not alone in this. I know you think you hurt people with your magic, but you don't. You do what you're supposed to. Look me in the eyes and please believe me when I say that those people dying, or getting hurt, it's entirely their fault." He frowned, tilting his head. " That came out harsher than I wanted it to. What I mean is, everybody know's winter is supposed to happen, and yet they go out in snow storms or skate on lakes anyway. That's their fault." Jack opened his mouth to protest, but Bunny held up a hand, cutting him off. " I know what you're going to say. ' But I made the storms, and the ice, I made it dangerous in the first place.' Jack, you were right before. Mother Nature has tasked you with making winter, which means you  _have_ to do it. None of this is your fault, you never hurt anybody." 

Jack sat silently, wishing,  _hoping,_ with all his might that everything Bunny said was true. Could it possibly be true? Could none of it be his fault? Was he actually innocent? He shook his head.  _No._ Of course not. Even if he didn't kill people, he was sure he'd hurt plenty of people's feelings. But, on the other hand...he hadn't meant to. But that made it worse, didn't it? No, it didn't. His head started to hurt. Why was he so confused? He looked up when Bunny suddenly started waving his hands around.

" Ugh! I just wish I'd been able so help you sooner. I respect that you wanted to keep your self harm a secret, and I respect your reasons for it, but I wish you'd told me sooner." He shook his head doggedly. " But I know now, and I intend to help you to the best of my ability. I know you're feelings and your self harm wont go away overnight. Heck, they might never go away. But I will help you. I will help you get better."

Jack hugged his knees, the emotion coil expanding. He barely managed to avoid breaking down completely as he thought about what Bunny was saying. He actually wanted to  _help._ Here was someone that thought he was innocent, and that cared for him enough to hurt when he hurt himself. Here was someone that didn't want him to self harm, and someone who would be sad if he died.He wasn't totally convinced that he wasn't evil, or that people died because of him. He wasn't totally sure he should stop cutting. But here was a person, sitting in front of him, that was convinced, and that was sure. And even if he didn't trust his own, he trusted this person's judgement.

Maybe there was hope for him after all.

" I want you to make me three promises, right here, right now." Bunny said suddenly. Jack's head snapped up, staring intently. He didn't know what these promises were, but already he was determined to keep them. He would make himself have the strength to keep these promises. For Bunny. For his hero.

" Number one," the pooka continued. " is the most important. I want you to promise me that your cutting and self harm wont turn into anything worse." His green eyes narrowed, willing Jack to hear him. "  _Stay Alive."_  Those two words. Those two words meant everything. 

" I-" his voice cracked. He cleared his throat. " I promise." But...those people...wouldn't they be better off if...already, he wasn't sure-

 _NO._ He would keep this promise. This promise was his reason for living.

" Number two. I realize you wont be able to do this every time, nor will you want to, but promise me that whenever you feel like cutting in the future, you'll visit me instead. Just like you did today." Jack frowned. Wouldn't he just- " And no, Jack, you wont bother me." The corners of his mouth twitched up. " Some of your pranks might, although I think you already knew that. But visiting me never bothers me. Not really." The emotion coil shrunk, a huge chunk of it disappearing, and Jack's mouth suddenly had the ghost of a smile as well. 

" I promise." Then he frowned again. " But you have you're own problems. You don't need to worry about mine too-" Again, he was interrupted by the easter warrior.

" That, Jack, was going to be my third promise. Like I said, I've seen other kids around the world start self harming. I think, one of the biggest reasons they don't want to tell anybody else is because of that. They think the other person can't handle it, that they don't need two sets of problems. And truth be told, not everyone can handle being told that their friend is self harming." Jack flinched. " But I can. I can handle it, you don't need to feel guilty for telling me anything. If anything in the future, anything at all, even if it seems like nothing, bothers you, than you tell me. Ok?" Jack nodded. " Promise me that you won't feel guilty for telling me anything."

The teen thought for a moment. Even if Bunny said he could handle it, caring for a self harmer, even knowing about one, is a huge responsibility.

" I can't promise that. I can't promise that I won't feel guilty, or that I will tell you everything, but I can promise that I will _try._ I'll try to tell you things." Bunny paused, then nodded.

" I guess that's fine. For now." His ears twitched. By now, Jack had forced himself to stop crying, but his face was still pink. 

" Are we good?" Bunny asked finally. Slowly, the winter spirit nodded. " Come here." They both stood up and embraced each other. Jack buried his face in Bunny's soft gray fur, who in turn rubbed the teens back. A stray thought popped into his mind that he probably looked like a five year old kid, but he pushed it away. That didn't matter right now. 

And little by little, the temperature returned to normal. 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please send me requests, and don't forget to Review! But, if you do, please answer the question: Do you think it's a little over the top? I want to hear what you think. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE tell me how to make it better.


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